Tweet of the Day: Are You Making Your Characters (and Yourself) Look Stupid?
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Yes, it is that time of the month again. Welcome to the Absolute Write Forum’s February 2012 Blog Chain. The rules are as follow:
This month’s prompt:
Second ChancesAgain, go wherever the prompt takes you. It can be fiction or non-fiction; the second chance in question can be a mushy valentine or a 1-up in Super Mario (or anything in between).
Instructions:
Simply post your blog’s URL in this thread to join. Each post should be less than 1000 words if possible. Read and comment on other participants’ posts if you possibly can–they’ll be doing the same for you!
For my entry I decided to post a Dragon’s Age: Origins fan fic based on the background story of a new character I made for the tabletop/pencil & paper version of the game. The character is a Dalish elf, one of the few who have survived countless persecutions and progroms by the humans of Thedas and now settled in a remote section of the nation of Ferelden after the war with the Archdemon. But tensions between humans and elves are not far from the surface. Blood has been spilled and it is up to Olwain to bare the burden.
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“Olwain, wait!” shouted Galina. Her voice silenced the woodland.
Olwain turned, weapons in hand, “What are you doing?”
“Trying to stop you from this foolish course, Olwain. I know that it was my brother who fired that arrow, not you. He told me everything.”
It was hard for Olwain to answer Galina’s charge. The stern look of her amber eyes, the way her blond hair framed her pointed ears. For a moment he wanted nothing more than to grab her by the hand and flee to some secluded part of the forest beyond the reach of man or beast.
He averted his eyes, “I helped the Shemlen and the boy died because of it. End of story.”
“We will fight,” said Galina.
He noticed the slight quiver in her voice. Each tone plucked at his nerves and strained his resolve. Each word beckoned him back to the fold.
“Don’t worry, I will return. When this is all over–”
“Over, it will never be over Olwain, not unless we fight for what is right. Stand and fight Olwain, don’t run, please.”
He grabbed her hand and put it over his heart, “This is not goodbye, just a farewell.”
She kissed him with a ferocity he had never known, a hunger that would not be fulfilled. Horns blared in the distance mixed with the baying of hounds.
Olwain pushed her aside, “Go, GO!”
He had his chance.
He made his choice.
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And here are the rest of the participants. Make sure to visit them and comment. Thank you:
Turndog-Millionaire – http://turndog-millionaire.com/ (link to this month’s post)
orion_mk3 – http://nonexistentbooks.wordpress.com (link to this month’s post)
Ralph Pines – https://ralfast.wordpress.com/ (link to this month’s post)
magicmint – http://www.loneswing.com/ (link to this month’s post)
Tomspy77 – http://thomaswillamspychalski.wordpress.com/ (link to this month’s post)
MamaStrong – http://writingofme.blogspot.com/ (link to this month’s post)
in_one – http://quirkythomas.blogspot.com/ (link to this month’s post)
magicmint – http://www.loneswing.com/ (link to this month’s post)
Tomspy77 – http://thomaswillamspychalski.wordpress.com/ (link to this month’s post)
LilGreenBookworm – http://themayhemofwritingsahm-style.blogspot.com/ (link to this month’s post)
LiterateParakeet – http://lesliesillusions.blogspot.com/ (link to this month’s post)
AFord – http://af12.webs.com/ (link to this month’s post)
writingismypassion – http://charityfaye.blogspot.com/ (link to this month’s post)
kiwiviktor81 – http://storygenerator.net/ (link to this month’s post)
AFord – http://af12.webs.com/ (link to this month’s post)
randi.lee – http://emotionalnovel.blogspot.com/ (link to this month’s post)
These Mean Streets – http://ohno-anotherwritingblog.blogspot.com/ (link to this month’s post)
areteus – http://lurkingmusings.wordpress.com/ (link to this month’s post)
Domoviye – http://living-working-in-china.blogspot.com/ (link to this month’s post)
pyrosama – http://matrix-hole.blogspot.com/ (link to this month’s post)
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Hey it’s Tomspy77 from AB, just on my phone so not signed into WordPress…
Nice little scene, I like it.
I never played the game so it was new to me and saying that I wished it would have started out with: “It was hard for Olwain…”
I think that would have been a better jumping in point, would have made me MORE curious about what happens next.
Excuse me if that seemed harsh, I enjoyed the scene though, great job!
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Don’t worry it wasn’t harsh at all. I disagree, but then again, I my have to let the scene cool down in my mind, so to speak. Thank you for your comment.
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Nice, clean and leaves me wanting for more.
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Thank you.
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We do seem to love the Bioware around here, don’t we? I have to admit, this offers some color for what is by far the most mundane and least exciting of the origin stories (especially compared to the city elf, ye gods).
Looking forward to a Dragon Age 2 version, where the same 5-10 blocks of prose are repeated for 80 hours with minor variations!
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Indeed we do, all the way back to Icewind Dale 😉 I played the Human Noble many times and just finished a run with a City Elf. The Mage one was good, sort of (in the no good deed goes unpunished sort of way) but playing anything other than a warrior is not for me. The other classes are too squishy for my rip their eyeballs and slit their innards style of play. 😀 Haven’t played DA:2. They tell me is not as good. Of course the game I’m waiting for is none other than Mass Effect 3. Can’t wait to transform into Commander Shepard one last time and romance Liara yet again!
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DA:2 is good in that the main character has a voice and personality a la Mass Effect and you can, through proper dialogue choices, make them a smartass. But it mercilessly recycles dungeon content, dumbs down a lot of mechanics, and (most damningly) has no central story or villain.
Kind of like Mass Effect 2 if you take away the suicide mission making everything hang together and throw in the massive copypaste dungeons from ME1, actually.
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That’s what I have heard overall, with only my cousin raving that it was “much better” but then, you show him prettied up graphics and he is happy. I liked the character interaction in ME2 and how you get to see the underbelly of the galaxy under the shiny exterior of ME1. Plus the game mechanics are way better and the abandoned the cut and paste maps from ME1. I will buy ME3 brand new, but I’ll get DA2 off the USED rack just the same. 😀
I even made a trailer for ME:3
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Nicely done. You are put straight into some action, and despite obviously being in the middle of something, you don’t seem at all lost. Fantasy isn’t my cup of tea, but i never the less liked this short short
Good job and viva la Blog chain
Matt (Turndog Millionaire)
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In media res….
Not easy to pull off. Glad that it didn’t spoil the experience for you.
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As always I am impressed with your dialogue. Hope to see more.
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Thanks. 😀
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Very nicely written. So much passion and drama in such a short piece. Nice job!
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Thank you Diane. I appreciate it.
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[…] (link to this month’s post) Ralph Pines – https://ralfast.wordpress.com/ (link to this month’s post) magicmint – http://www.loneswing.com/ (link to this month’s post) Tomspy77 – […]
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I’m not into fantasy either but this would make me turn the page. Nice job.
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Mission accomplished. 😀
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I enjoy writing fantasy so it’s always nice to see how someone else does it. You seem to have a good grasp of the pacing of tension in a story, with a dramatic opening and then a finish that leaves the reader looking for more. I would have liked to have seen more background but then you are limited by word length.
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An infodump is one of the best ways to derail a story, any story. Best to parcel out the information. Besides it is in the nature of fan fiction that the reader is already familiar with the setting. Unfair to the new comer, I know, but there you go.
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[…] out more posts from the blog chain; Turndog-Millionaire – orion_mk3 — Ralph Pines — magicmint — Tomspy77 — LilGreenBookworm — LiterateParakeet — AFord […]
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Ohh, excellent job! I loved it.
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Thank you for the praise.
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[…] (link to this month’s post) Ralph Pines – https://ralfast.wordpress.com/ (link to this month’s post) magicmint – http://www.loneswing.com/ (link to this month’s post) Tomspy77 – […]
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[…] (link to this month’s post) Ralph Pines – https://ralfast.wordpress.com/ (link to this month’s post) magicmint – http://www.loneswing.com/ (link to this month’s post) Tomspy77 – […]
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Not bad. A little bit more info, not an info dump, but just a tad more information would have been nice for those of us who never played the game.
Fairly well written.
Cheers
Dan
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