Tweet of the Day: The Dragon Year
——-
We kick off the New Year with a Blogfest. The 3rd Annual NO KISS Blogfest that is!
Da’ Rulez:
What: The No Kiss Blogfest! This is when you get to write a scene or post one from your favorite books, movies, or tv shows that show the almost kiss— the rising, crushing, excruciating, longing, tension that comes when two characters get oh-so-close to kissing that you can just feel it, want it, NEED it….and then…they don’t!
——-
The elevator doors slid open. They bumped into each other. Instinct kicked in. She grabbed the front of his shirt, his hands grabbed her shoulders. His bright blue eyes locked on her soft brown ones. In the moment between breaths the world stood still.
Hadn’t they, on the Friday before last met at the pub around the corner from the office?
Didn’t they had that kiss on the cheek greeting that came too close to each others lips?
A “what was that” kind of moment?
They both exhaled.
She said, “Hi!”
He said, “Hey!”
The man behind her said, “Excuse me.”
The broke off in a rush of “I’m sorry” and “After you.”
He got on the elevator, she got off. His fingertips tingled, her cheeks blazed.
Then the doors closed.
——-
Neither Here nor There.... 
I like how minimalist this is — but we still see the confusion and the split second of awkwardness perfectly.
LikeLike
I thought that less was more. Just focus on the moment as the song says before the moment is gone.
LikeLike
I love it! Especially the “in the moment between breaths” etc. I agree with Amalia, and I kind of feel like the minimalism also gives it a kind of poetic feel.
🙂
LikeLike
In my mind the prompt called for compressing as much emotion in as little time as possible. A blink and you miss it kind of thing. Otherwise it doesn’t make sense (outside of a contrived incident, IMHO) not to have the kiss.
And I’m a minimalist when it comes to descriptions.
Thank you mia for the kind words. May 2012 be Happy and Merry for you and yours.
LikeLike
Wow. That was great!
LikeLike
Thank you very much.
LikeLike
That was cool. I like the rapid action and all the confusion that takes place in such a short time. Thanks for participating!
LikeLike
Thanks for having me. I like to think of this kiss as a kiss delayed instead of a kiss denied. 😉
LikeLike
In a such a short scene we actually get a few almost kisses. Well done. I love that her instinct was to grab the front of his shirt.
LikeLike
I had to establish that they had a relationship before the incident without boring the reader with to much exposition. And well, she knows what she wants and it is not afraid to grab for it, I think.
LikeLike
OH I LOVE THIS. I love short little flash fiction like this! Sometimes it shows way more than a longer story does!
LikeLike
I have a thing for flash fics. Like I said before, I’m a minimalist/underwriter who always wants to get to the point as fast as possible. Works well here, but it can be a pain in longer stories. Glad you liked it. 😀
LikeLike
As they say “less is more” Great little flash of excitement for me! 😉
LikeLike
I was going to write a Harry Potter fic for this, but I decided to go in a different direction and I’m glad i did. Thank you.
LikeLike
I loved the, “What was that kind of moment?” line and how it hints at so much going on, the subtext. Very cool 🙂
LikeLike
Tricky thing to pull off and I fail more than I succeed on that score, but well worth the effort. Sometimes “telling” trumps “showing”. 😉
LikeLike